2 months and counting
In two months time I will pack my bags, and leave London (after nine years sucking the marrow out of this fair city) to return to the North West. It's a necessary move so that I can retrain as a teacher, and its only for a year... but frankly, it's starting to hurt already.
I *love* London. I love the fact that you can buy buffet bars at 3am, that you can go to a West End musical whenever you choose. I love the fact that you can find a bar or a club that lets you be whoever you want...
The trains and tubes in London run every couple of minutes! When I am standing freezing on a platform in 'the sticks' for several hours, I shall remember the time that I used to think 5 minutes was a huge delay....
When I leave the pub and have to walk three miles home I'll day dream about the blinking orange light coming towards me ready to drop me safely back home.
From the second that I stepped out of my fathers car, all wobbly legged like Bambi at the age of 18 to be engulfed in smoke and shiny pavements, rushing people and plodding tourists... palaces (real ones), cocktails, free museums and tesco metros.... I have really loved it here.
I love my sweet little house, and my brilliant flatmate... I love our 'E' channel nights and the impressions we can do of Pamela Anderson and E I Woody (the paparazzi guy). I love fighting over who makes the pots of tea and getting excited about having chocolate hobnobs left in the tin.
I can stop this move right now if I want to, and stay in a job that I hate and that bores me... or I can take it on the chin... it's only for a year after all and I will be coming back most weekends...
But, remember that apart from the museums and the palaces all my friends and my boyfriend are in London....
So, what if I am making a mistake...?? What if I get back to London and it's all spoiled...? What if I fail my course? What if I am a terrible teacher...? it's a huge risk to give up the incredible life I have spent so long creating here for a career that I don't even know if I can do....
I'm really scared.
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(5.5.04 11:31) you will be fine - and what you're doing is brave, but brilliant. London might change when you're away - but your mates and your man will still be here for you as they always have been, because they love you and they'll wait for you. have I gone a bit Brideshead Revisited or what? xx |
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(5.5.04 11:32) Best of luck to you. Follow your instincts and dreams, and if that is teaching, then go for it girl. |
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Daisy / Website (5.5.04 11:37) Bless you both... and JoJo - I hope you're right! X |
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(5.5.04 11:42) Good luck and the best thing about it all is that you get to share more drinks in the hog's head with me! :P |
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(5.5.04 11:43) You'll be fine and it'll all still be here in its rude, noisy, polluted, cramped, overpriced, grey, shit-quality-of-life way when you get back 
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Daisy / Website (5.5.04 11:52) Davey - ohhh - had forgotten that!! Nick - yes goddam having to live a stones throw from a beautiful beach and large pine woods for a year... You're all lovely x x |
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(5.5.04 11:54) well think about it...if you carry on with the job you hate, maybe you'll start to love London less? (impossible, though it may sound) and you'll be able to appreciate this stinking, roaring, fantabulous place even more after you've been away! so go! and good luck! |
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(5.5.04 11:57) And besides, if your long term plan is to come to fruition, it isn't just London you'll be leaving. Don't forget to apply for your young persons railcard (you can get one if you're a student, no?) |